a day of philosophizeing

today i had a long ass walk. the significance of such walks is that i end up thinking really deeply about the nature of the world we live in
the top aphanies that i had today:
that the arts are like a legend. they start with a simple tail, or story, or concept. and they are the truth. but with each retelling, each verbal recounting, the tale grows, and emphasizes the horrors of the tragedy, the greatness of the actions of heroes, and yet, they too are true

that people are like the stars and planets of the heavens. each one is different. some are balls of bright flaming gas, while other are frozen hell holes, while some are paradise incarnate. each is unique. but if you were to lesson the gap between them, make the hell holes more bearable, but paradise less so it is essayer to bring all of them further up. and their uniqueness will not vanish, but return tenfold with the advance meant of the whole

and yet at the same time, people are like French fries. some are awesome and curly and taste like heaven, some are gurby, mass manufactured and tasteless, while some , like home fries, appear to express the true nature of the fries, almost as to be entirely different. but fires are still fires, no matter what you call them, hide their flavor behind ketchup and other sauces, group them with hamburgers, cover them in yummy animal styleness, they are in the end: just fires, no more, no less

break ups are hard

you know i hate the endings of realtion ships the most, becouse i end up thinking it's all my falt, and that it's me. me me me. why do i alwasy fuck up the good bits of life? why when i sudenly have everything i ever wanted to i go and wreak it? i hate hate hate hate HATE my inner self for making me feel like i need to. gah fuck my life

4th july

well well well!
awesome sauce stuff happened.
it all started with waking up at 12:07 and realized that i said i was going to a picnic at 12 with Tiona and Gina and well to make a long story short it really didn't start till like 2, so i was only 20min late(i blame the bus).and we hung out at the park for awhile talking and eating, then it was getting hella cold and stuff, so we headed back to my place (it was the closest) and we Hung out and watch Alex reads twilight and other YouTube stuff. so like around 5 they both left, and i was just Reading when my home boy will called me up and we deiced to try to gather some ppls, and we kinda failed at that,so we ended up going to Eli and jay's party at like 12:00, and it was awesome. met this awesome girl called Kenrda, and we were playing apples to apples and lighting fire works and stuff; it was awesome.buttt Willem is a light weight and quickly got very drunk, much to the rest of our amusement.
he spent 1/2 an hour chasing Eli, trying to steal his pants.after awhile of randomne stupid stuff like this, i deiced it was time to take will back to my place so he could crash/recover. i enlsted Kendra to help he, and after an hour of threathing, pleading, and dragging willem we Finlay got him to my house, after tucking him in to bead, me and Kendra had this awesome 5 hour long conversation,gah it was great. i made eggs for all three of us, and then we spent like an hour at borders and shit. after that we all went our spreate ways.
it was awesome